Tuesday, November 20, 2012

A Blinking Mind, a Thankful Heart


I close my eyes for a brief moment as we taxi to the runway. It is somehow soothing to be on a plane. As the engines speed up and we take off, rising smoothly into the air, I turn to look out the window. I love to fly at night and see the city lights dwindling below. And I suddenly don't know where I am or where I am going. Not to or from Ecuador, is my first realization. Nor to or from Chicago, is my next wistful thought. Then... oh, yes. Denver. I'm looking at Denver. It seems my mind blinked and forgot I was leaving somewhere new.

     It's strange how one's upbringing affects one's life. I grew up traveling. And somehow traveling just feels right. My 6 hours in the bus wasn't all that bad. The 16 hour road trip was delightful. And my 2 hour flight is soothing. I am very much looking forward to being home and no longer a guest, yet I find a certain familiar thrill in traveling and a joy in seeing people and participating in their lives.
     I sit on a Southwest plane, surrounded by the warm rumbling of the engines and the soft murmuring of my fellow passengers, and I think on how I have been blessed recently. Blessed to witness the union of two dear friends before Christ. Blessed to reunite with friends of old. Blessed to make new friends, though they are scattered across the nation. Blessed to be able to share how God has led me to join in His work in Chicago, to see others catch this vision as He moves in their hearts. 
     This last blessing is especially appreciated. For sometimes, in brief moments of discouragement, I wonder if I am doing the right thing, if life wouldn't be easier some other way. And yet, as I perused the departure board before boarding my eye strayed to the word Chicago - and my heart leapt. I sighed, realizing that was not my destination. But that is where God has led my heart, and that is where I long to be. I miss talking with my Jr. High kids, teaching during Bible time, driving van route, serving with the other ICI missionaries, helping the kids think through different aspects of the gospel. I remember kneeling in the pine needles in the forested mountains of Ecuador and hearing my Lord say "Go." Just as Isaiah said, "Here am I, send me,"  I am ready. Just as Jeremiah cried out, "Your word is like a fire in my bones, I cannot keep it in,"  I am compelled. These assurances I remember when I lose sight of the why of support raising. And I remember what a privilege and blessing it is.
     As the plane begins its final descent, I am grateful that on top of the privilege of meeting with people and sharing the exciting way God is moving in Chicago, I get to travel. By plane, bus, car, and train. I get to see prairie dogs and windmills, the Rockies and corn fields, each with their own unique beauty. And I am presented over and over again with opportunities to praise my Lord. 
O LORD my God, when I in awesome wonder
Consider all the works thy hands have made...
Then sings my soul, my Saviour God to thee,
How Great Thou Art!
Beautiful Colorado

The person I used to be.

“We all change, when you think about it. We’re all different people all through our lives. And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep movin...